I was born in Orange County, California. I was a severely asthmatic child and spent a lot of time in hospitals and medical offices. I wasn't expected to live because of this. I accepted Jesus at age 8, and it gave me hope that death wasn't the end. By age 10 my parents found a doctor who promised a cure for my asthma, but it required taking me to the brink of death with starvation diets, bi-weekly hydrocolonics, and handfuls of pills three times a day. My parents spent a fortune on my medical care.
When I was eleven, we moved to Oregon and my health drastically changed for the better. By age 13 I was a rebellious runaway, so angry over having been starved and having no control over anything in my life. By 14, I was on my own, couch surfing and bouncing from pedophile to pedophile. I desperately wanted to be loved; although I believed in God, I felt so betrayed by Him. I lived with a friend through most of high-school. By the end of my Senior year, I was so full of self hatred that I yielded. I cried out to God for my husband, promising God; if he gave me my person, I would give Him my whole heart. I couldn't continue my life of self destruction another day. I met my husband Tony days later, and we were married within the year.
Tony and I faced insane challenges, but overcame them. I honored my promise to God and completely turned my life around. We had three miraculous children, a cute home, and we owned a successful Christian preschool/daycare center. Although my life was far from perfect, it was the best it had ever been.
Until Memorial day 1996, when my friend and I went rafting with my sister and brother-in-law. That day changed everything. I mis-navigated the river and caused my friend and I to plummet into a deep ferocious whirlpool. We were thrown from our rafts and fighting for our lives in an instant. I drowned and died in Spencer's hole that day.
Dead for 10 minutes.
I was underwater for over 10 minutes, but at the feet of Jesus for what seemed longer than my entire life. Heaven surpassed everything my mind could have imagined. It was home, and for the first time in my life I was loved at a depth my heart had desperately ached for, but now couldn't contain. It was the greatest experience of my existence, times infinity. But I wasn't allowed to stay. I begged and pleaded, but was forced back with no explanation.
I was back on Earth. In a instant, I had gone from perfect soul penetrating love, to dark, cold filth. It took me many years to process heaven's truth and lessons, many years trying to understand how Jesus could love me so deeply, yet send me away with no explanation. I also had to learn how to live authentically serving God as opposed to what I did before Heaven. I now knew perfect truth, but I felt as though I spoke a different language, unknown to humans. The hardest lesson was learning to live in something I previously didn't believe in. My brain didn't believe in people coming back from Heaven, especially a sinner like me! Why would God choose me?
The Great Adventure.
I now have the answers I need. I've learned to hear the voices of God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit in my life. I know how to be completely reliant on God's leadership, and I joyfully submit. The proof of this is the signs and wonders that follow me. I love being used to bring people into God's kingdom. I yearn to be His hands and feet.
Tony and I have now been married over thirty four years. We have four amazing kids, and two granddaughters. Our life is a great adventure of loving and dancing through the storms. Tony works hard to support my many ministries, and I work hard show him my appreciation. Our marriage rivals the best love stories. My life is wonderful, because I know how my story ends.